Infertile Ramblings

So, I started spotting (brown discharge) on Wednesday, but it's never enough to use a tampon. Well today is Friday and I am set to begin taking my second round of Clomid on CD 5. That is Sunday, if these last few days count as a cycle day. I am not set to get AF until Jan. 18th, so this is about 1 week early. I called my dr and the nurse said that it could be an early period. She also stated that Clomid can cause some early spotting. I basically have to just wait a few days but I am waiting to hear back about the Clomid deal. If this counts as cycle days, then I will start round 2 (higher dosage) on Sunday. Honestly, it's worth it all but right now, I'm just annoyed.

I've been feeling really sick today. Nothing I can't handle but I get queasy every now and then. I tried eating lunch earlier and my body couldn't take it. Needless to say, it wasn't as good the second time around. I certainly hope I am not getting the flu! I just got over a cold so the flu would be killer, especially mixed with AF and Clomid symptoms!

I'm also really tired of hearing people who have no clue what infertility is like, pretend that they do. We are just recently told that we have been in the IF pool for almost 4 years and it sucks. There are so many women I've had the pleasure of talking to, who have struggled for even more years. There are even those who struggle to conceive even with IF procedures. It just breaks my heart. Then you get those women who struggle for a few months, MAYBE 1 year, and end up pregnant. They "reflect" on their struggle and feel it necessary to say they have gone through hell to conceive, even though they already have a few kids. I just find it all very sad. Humbling, nonetheless, because I realize those who have TRULY struggled to become parents are the ones who deserve children the most and end up being some of the best parents. It just sucks that some people have no tact and/or clue as to what life is like outside their own bubble. What's worse is when it's someone you know personally. ICK! Call me cranky but, that's how I'm feeling today.

I was too ill to babysit for my friend today, so I didn't get to cuddle with the baby like I have been. Oddly, being around babies and holding them doesn't hurt. In fact, I am usually happier! My maternal instincts kick in and I am simply awesome. Just call me the baby-whisperer.

XoXo